Book Giveaway: The Book of Transformations

Okay, so I have TEN signed copies of The Book of Transformation to give away. All you have to do is just say, in no more than a sentence in the comments section, why I ought to send a book to you. Then I’ll email the ten best/most amusing/appalling entries purely on a whim; we can then sort out where you want the book sent, and I’ll bung a signed copy in the post to you. Just like that.

I’ll run this until Sunday night.


EDIT: Turns out that, due to the fact that my publishers accidentally sent me more author samples, I can give away a few more. We’ll say 15 copies for now!

Share this Story

About Mark Newton

Born in 1981, live in the UK. I write about strange things.


  1. I deserve a copy because:

    I’m cute and fluffy!

  2. If you send me one I promise not to break into your house and steal your whisky collection.

  3. Because I am not as good looking, talented or as young as you!

  4. I just NEED to read it so very much, otherwise I will be sitting reading the empty space between my hands!

  5. Because the dog ate my homework, my tummy hurts, and mother didn’t buy me candy at the store? Those three separately worked as excuses at various ages for various misdeeds, so together they have triple the power right? RIGHT?!

  6. I only have the kindle version of it. Would love a “real” copy. Let see….I am a really nice guy…we are both Mini owners. In the states when you are driving and pass a mini you give a wave so this is like a wave but better. Mark ..hey look at that we have same first name too.

  7. Because then I’d have the whole series, and not two books in the same edition!

  8. Because I write you the best reviews

  9. Because fortuna imperatrix mundi

  10. Because I need your signature in order to sign forged cheques in your name in Gauntleys.

  11. There are four innocent little babies in my cellar who are going to suffer horribly unless you send me a copy.

  12. Because I can fulfill the “obsessive fangirl” label my bestie has given me unless I have every signed thing I can get my stumpy little hands on.

    Also I totally sided with you against Abercrombie on the whiskey, that has to be worth something, right? 😛

  13. I need a copy because I’ve vicariously lived lives in almost all of the red sun era tales and need the travel brochures to yours to make my final decision on which to use my space time and story to spend my retirement in.

  14. Because the best things in life are free

  15. Because I have therapy this coming Monday.

  16. I’ve just finished writing the second draft of my first novel and it’s too late for me to steal all your ideas (although I can give no such guarantee for my second novel, which has a working title of The Book Of Changing From One Thing To Another)

  17. Because we have top men working on it right now. Top. Men.

  18. I retract my earlier comment; I already have signed things, I do not deserve more until I do something worthwhile.

  19. I am currently fighting with the hideous monstrosity of project management software and could really use quality literature to regain much-needed sanity points.

  20. Ruin I did with a Puffin – so Transformations just has to be a Great Auk after swilling more whisky!

  21. Because I seem to remember a previous version of the above mentioned title and all the fun/effort/phone bills/laughter that went into its creation, “long live ‘the book’!!!

  22. Because there’s a lonely, empty space on my bookshelf where the ‘N’s reside and I don’t like lonely, empty spaces on my bookshelf and when don’t like something I get sad and when I get sad I get I mad and when I get mad sometimes things get broken…capiche?

  23. Because I’d like to read your work after getting to know you on Twitter 🙂

  24. Because I am your mother

  25. Because if you don’t, there will be bands of rabid gray squirrels scouring the countryside, driving off the red squirrels, before they come scurrying over your walls and up your legs to nibble on your ears.

  26. Because the bunny will get it if you don’t send me a copy!!

  27. because I’d like to beat all those bloggers who have posted, even if they’re more deserving.

  28. You get free copies anyway!

  29. Because I haven’t read it, I’ll look after it and pass it on to another to enjoy.

  30. You should send this book to me because not only will I read and enjoy it, but I’ll also employ an arcane process of fermentation to render edible and rich with micronutrients in order to feed it to some stray cats who are presently engaging in delightful mischief in my neighborhood.

  31. I’ll keep it secret, I’ll keep it safe; and when Gandalf says, I’ll take it to Mordor post-haste.

  32. I should win because every minute that I don’t a goblin will die.

  33. I should win because I just read ’50 Shades of Grey’ and it was your fault!!!

  34. I should have a copy because I gave you this link to this rather amusing song, Hurry Up GRR Martin, also if I don’t, a small elf will cry


  35. Because you’d be letting down not only myself but also Klara, Ingrid, Tilde, Freja and all the other members of the Swedish International Under 25s Ladies Beach Volleyball Team if you don’t.

  36. Ohh if the threat of bunnycide does not work, you would have to put up with me on twitter asking where can I chase you down to sign a copy.

  37. You should send me a book, because I know where the bones are buried.

  38. Because otherwise I’ll inform your publisher of that morally questionable thing you did that one time (then where will your career be, hmmm?.